Attitude

I suppose that with a title like attitude, a person might be enticed to look at this post because it might not be about coronavirus (novel).

But it is.

I’m writing this and listening to Susan Tedeschi sing midnight in Harlem. I’m listening to her because I want to reset my attitude having just returned from a Corona run to the grocery store for our elderly neighbor. Actually the grocery store adventure was more of a mission than a run. Not a mission from God though, because with the churches and mosques shut down it looks like the Gods have elected to take a piece of Health Canada’s advice and wash their hands of this whole sordid affair. So, in this instance it looks like we’ve decided to put our faith in science, health care professionals, grocery store staff and truck drivers.

Who knew that faith is transferable and you can put it wherever you want?

My best sense is that being a current employee at any major grocer has got to be a job only slightly better than an E.R. nurse. Both occupations at this moment are very much required to be staffed and both occupations are seeing people at their worst.

Granted, no one is needing to be put on a ventilator in Safeway.

Anyway, I’ve been seeing a few different attitudes as a result of Covid reminding people of just how tenuous our existence really is. Two of the attitudes are remarkably opposite of one another when you consider that they originate from the same source. The source is the fact that this threat to their complacency and comfort is invisible. A virus cannot be detected by the human eye. A virus has no smell and you can’t feel it with your hands and so it’s difficult for some people to comprehend what they’re dealing with.

So, some people have decided that, fuck it, I’m not going to stress over something I can’t see, and those are the people going to bars, and not washing their hands or self isolating after they get back from Italy. The second group from the same source is terrified of this threat that they can’t see. These are the dickheads buying all the toilet paper while dressed in hazmat suits that the nurses should be wearing.

Both attitudes are dangerous by the way. One group is hoarding all the face masks that people need, and the other group is why we need more face masks. What we really need is an attitude right in the middle of these two extremes. However, our inability as a race to behave with thought and moderation is why it’s only a matter of time until hoarding laws are re-enacted and the army is going to be required to force a quarantine.

I think that during this time, all of us are going to have a moment of reckoning. Maybe you’re lying awake staring at the ceiling and letting your imagination create a series of worst case scenario’s, when all of a sudden your pulse quickens and you realize this is a big deal. Maybe you’re watching the news and the pulse quickening starts after the stock market news or the latest update on the numbers of infected people.

That pulse quickening needs to be controlled. Managed before your brain gets overruled by some sort of def-con 7 panic that compels you to engage in all manner of mouth breathing fucktardeness. Like fighting for groceries or insisting that it’s just a flu that the media is blowing out of proportion.

By the way, blaming the media for your anxiety is the modern day version of shoot the messenger. There are a shit ton of examples from Plutarch to Shakespeare where the bearer of bad news ends up punished for delivering that news, so being dondelusional about reality isn’t a new phenomena.

But in fiction and in fact, the delivered news was obviously true, and the truth of that news remains intact regardless of the abuse heaped upon the messenger.

Stop that shit. If you want to ignore the news, please understand that ignoring something implies that you’ve accepted there’s something to ignore. Which means that your willful ignorance is potentially dangerous and a precursor to martial law. It also seems to me that willful ignorance is a slippery slope. Once you’ve decided to slap some blinders on reality then you’re only a couple of Facebook posts away from believing that the whole thing is a hoax perpetrated by the deep state,

Funny how a person can’t see or identify a virus or the deep state but can believe with a passion that one exists and the other doesn’t.

Anyway……………attitude.

I’m trying to remain centered and logical. I feel the pull of panic directing me to the grocery store. I’m not sure if that pull is straight up selfishness or a certainty that if I don’t get groceries then it’s going to be too late after all the panic buyers have sucked the shelves clean. I managed that anxiety by making certain we have enough supplies to last us if we end up locked down for two weeks. I haven’t succumbed to the hoarding siren song.

I’ve watched with respect as friends and neighbors have returned from holiday and willfully self isolated for the suggested two weeks. I’ve reached out to those people to see if they need me to assist them with errands out of deference to their wisdom.

I think I’ve accepted that this invisible microbe has changed the world and there’s nothing I can do to wish it away or deny it’s existence. I’ve kind of shrugged, accepted the new world order and started trying to sort out what I can do and need to do to get through it. Basically, I’ve decided that there’s not much sense in freaking out because the virus doesn’t give a fuck about my emotional state.

I’m hoping that we get our act together and self isolate enough to slow the spread until healthcare can manage it. I can help with that so I’ll comply.

I’m hoping that we develop treatment drugs and a vaccine quicker than the best estimates. I can’t help with that, so I accept the fact that the people who can develop a vaccine are trying their best.

I’m prepared to assist my friends and my community if I’m capable and if required. I can help with that.

I think I’ve accepted the circumstances of March 2012, and that acceptance has provided me with a grim calmness that’s the perfect antidote for panic.

Hopefully this attitude will remain with me until this storm has become a memory.

Hopefully.