Anxiety

In one form or another, anxiety has and will exist for every person who breathes this planets’ air.

I suppose there could be a situation where someone is born wealthy, healthy, intelligent, beautiful and in possession of a perfectly stable temperament. I guess it’s plausible that person could also cruise through their entire life without a misstep, mishap or misfortune ever causing them any negative consequence.

But, it’s unlikely.

For the rest of us, it’s only a matter of time until responsibility produces stress, and stress produces anxiety. Which leads me to wonder if we’re currently dealing with anxiety correctly. It would seem that if anxiety is a foregone conclusion then it’s counterproductive to think we can eliminate worry from our lives, or even that it’s healthy to do so.

I just interchanged the word worry with the word anxiety. The words have much in common and I’ve always looked at anxiety as a physiological reaction to a psychological reaction. A worry fixation that becomes manic and then manifests itself in all kinds of interesting ways.

Sadly, life is a series of worries, and then you die. How you’ve managed those worries then becomes your legacy. Legacies don’t care if they’re good or bad, they just are. So, you can be remembered for putting your head down and carrying on when the shit hits the fan, or you can be remembered as that guy that decided to sit on a cardboard box and panhandle for enough cash to buy cough syrup.

The decision to buy Buckley’s means that I’m judging you, but with a caveat. It’s obvious that you’ve said fuck it and given up, but I don’t know your circumstances. So I’m not ready to say conclusively that I wouldn’t be sitting beside you if the same shit had rained down on me that you’ve endured.

Life is a game. Some people win and some people lose. Sometimes the winners are good and sometimes they’re lucky. For most people though there are going to be times where you get dealt a shitty hand. The trick is a timely fold or to bluff well enough with a pair of two’s to stay in the game until you draw a full house.

But you’ve got to stay in the game, and dealing with anxiety is built right into the rules.

So, I don’t think it’s healthy or realistic to think that you can or should be anxiety free. All of our best stories and most notable accomplishments come from stressful times where we’ve managed our trials and tribulations and come out on top. Not necessarily unscathed, but intact and a little wiser.

So, how do people manage anxiety? Obviously, some people don’t manage at all, but the majority of people at least have some rudimentary management tools. For starters, you need to ascertain what’s causing your discomfort and then apply some logic to resolving that discomfort. But, it’s important to understand when there’s fuck all you can do except wait for your fate to be determined by persons or circumstances beyond your control.

Like waiting for a jury to render a decision.

With the exception of the odd felony, most circumstances that cause anxiety do have some countermeasures you can enact that serve two purposes. The first being a possible solution to the problem that makes the anxiety disappear. The second service provided is that an action taken keeps you busy and focused. That action might not perfectly resolve your anxiety issue but it will provide a distraction, and the anxiety will temporarily abate because you’re too fucking busy to worry.

Or you can sit on your ass and burn lavender oil while meditating to recorded whale songs. Or, you can go and see your doctor and then your pharmacist. Your house might smell nice and you may be temporarily relaxed, but the root cause of your worry still exists and it’ll be right in your face when the whales are submerged and the Prozac wears off.

Once you’ve become a seasoned traveler on planet earth you learn how to constructively direct your anxiety. You learn how to anticipate what could go wrong and sometimes your pre-worrying comes in mighty handy. At this point in your life you’ve learned to embrace your anxiety as a warning born of experience and intuitiveness.

Once you’ve reached this lofty phase of human development you’re easily identified.

You’re now the person that allows enough time for traffic so you don’t miss your flight. You’re the person that doesn’t run out of gas on a lonely stretch of serial killer highway hunting ground. You’re the person who’s managed your anxiety and turned it into something useful.

Like having a plan and a plan B when the first plan goes for a shit.

The trick is to harness the energy provided by anxiety and then channel that energy toward exploring solutions to the root cause.

Anxiety is not necessarily your enemy. It’s a survival tool that elevates your awareness and competitiveness. Anxiety is your brain telling you to wake the fuck up and think your way out of whatever mess you’ve created or wandered in on. Anxiety is your brain telling you that preparation is a fine idea. Anxiety is the key that releases the chemical hounds our brains normally keep tethered. Anxiety makes you creative and amps you up chemically for a D-day landing or a speech in a public forum.

So, I think that the quest to eliminate anxiety from your life is a foolish aspiration. Embrace your anxiety. Make friends with your worry. Accept that the act of worrying is a sign that you’re alive and you’re up to the challenge of the day.

Because you spent the whole fucking night before stressing over this moment.

And you’re prepared.